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I wish I could forget the day my boss pulled me into the office along with my co worker Jim, the co worker who gave me the cocaine.  He sat is down and asked us how was our home lives, how was family, then asked if we had savings plans and money saved up. It didn’t dawn on either of us that we would be receiving pink slips for poor performance over the last six months.

Now. I couldn’t even support the bad habit that made me feel so good. I went home and destroyed the house to symbolize how I felt inside. Then I sat outside on the porch and though about my next move. I needed money. I needed a fix so I wouldn’t feel so broken. Jim was killed later that night. I guess he had messed with the wrong people, so I couldn’t go to him g or anything. My wife wasn’t returning my calls. I missed the life I had.

Nevertheless my high was a more important. Yes, even more important than my house. Time had gone by so fast that I forgot I didn’t have a job and couldn’t pay rent. I sold most of the things I had in the house for cheap for fixes. Reasonable prices to say the least. So, now I was out on my feet and out on the street.

I remembered a nearby shelter I took my cousin to until she was able to get housing. Sadly to say, she was still there. She vouched for me, but there was one rule…. I had to be clean. Upon getting my room, the first thing I did was put my family’s picture on the wall. That was my motivation. Yet, I failed.

Within two weeks, I had a job interview at a steel making company. Jittered and not able to sit still, I threw up twice and couldn’t make it to the interview. Later that day I was arrested for posession of cocaine and being under the influence. Still, I though hard work and dedication would get back to where I needed to be. I had nothing to do but think now. Three months is a lot of time to do so. Still my wife wouldn’t answer, but she did bring the kids to see me. That let me know she at least checked the messages.

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